Archive for August 2007
I’m getting my penis soon…
So, funny story. I just got off the phone with Robert. To him, and that whole crew, I’m one of the guys. Well I texted him earlier telling him I needed his help with something. When he called I told him that I need his help with Fantasy Football. To which he responded, “You’re going to get your penis soon.”
LMFAO! WoW! Am I really that bad? I mean…I don’t try to be a tom boy. Have you met my brother and my dad? It’s really not my fault. I grew up at the ranch hunting and my dad sold guns and we were always at a sporting event for my brother or tinkering with cars.
I informed Robert (who is also like a brother to me) that if anything, it was his and my brother’s fault for letting me hang out with them all the time growing up.
I guess maybe I should try to be more girly. I don’t know how that could be possible though. I mean I wear dresses and do my hair and makeup and everything. On the outside I appear girly!
I guess I can see why I might be intimidating to guys. When a girl knows more about cars and guns than you do…it’s kind of like me saying hey, my dick’s bigger. I don’t mean to. It’s just me. I guess I just need to find a real manly man.
FYI…I am currently accepting applications for a real manly man!
2 comments August 31, 2007
Donating my hair…
Next weekend I will be cutting approximately 6-8 inches of my hair off. I would like to do something worth while with it, as I have always had very pretty hair. I thought about donating, however it’s not quite to the length generally required. Locks of Love requires it to be 10 inches and Wigs for Kids requires at least 12.
If you guys know of anywhere else that might accept a shorter length, please let me know.
Add comment August 30, 2007
Joke of the Day!
Add comment August 30, 2007
Angels exist…
But sometimes, since they don’t all have wings, we call them friends.
AWWWWWWWWWWWW…
Add comment August 29, 2007
Getting my hair cut and colored…
Just like this….

That’s seriously like cutting 8 inches off of my hair…maybe if it’s enough I can donate it to charity or something. That’s not a bad idea. I’m not sure if I’m cutting enough off though.
Anyways, back to the point…what do you guys think that color and cut would look like on me? Bueno?
Add comment August 29, 2007
Joke of the Day!
A guy stuck his head into a barber shop and asked, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looked around the shop full of customers and said, “About 2 hours.” The guy left. A few days later the same guy stuck his head in the door and asked, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looked around at the shop and said, “About 3 hours.” The guy left. A week later the same guy stuck his head in the shop and asked, “How long before I can get a haircut?” The barber looked around the shop and said, “About an hour and a half.” The guy left. The barber turned to a friend and said, “Hey, Bill, do me a favor. Follow that guy and see where he goes. He keeps asking how long he has to wait for a haircut, but then he doesn’t ever come back.” A little while later, Bill returned to the shop, laughing hysterically. The barber asked, “So where does that guy go when he leaves?” Bill looked up, tears in his eyes and said, “Your house.”
Add comment August 29, 2007
Joke of the Day!
A man walked into a very high-tech bar. As he sat down on a stool he noticed that the bartender was a robot. The robot clicked to attention and asked, “Sir, what will you have?”
The man thought a moment then replied? “A martini please.” The robot clicked a couple of times and mixed the best martini the man had ever had.
The robot then asked, “Sir, what is your IQ?” The man answered, “Oh, about 164.”
The robot then proceeded to discuss the theory of relativity, inter-stellar space travel, the latest medical breakthroughs, etc…
The man was most impressed. He left the bar but thought he would try a different tact. He returned and took a seat. Again the robot clicked and asked what he would have?
“A martini please.”
Again it was superb. The robot again asked ”What is your IQ sir?”
This time the man answered, “Oh about 100″. So the robot started discussing NASCAR racing, the latest basketball scores, and what to expect the Braves to do this week end.
The guy had to try it one more time. So he left, returned and took a stool…..
Again a martini, and the question, “What is your IQ?” This time the man drawled out “Uh….. ’bout 50″.
The robot clicked then leaned close and very slowly asked,
“A-r-e…
y-o-u-r…
p-e-o-p-l-e…
g-o-I-n-g…
t-o..
n-o-m-I-n-a-t-e…
H-I-l-l-a-r-y-?????
Add comment August 28, 2007
Email from my Aunt…
There was a young woman who had been diagnosed with a terminal illness and had been given three months to live. So as she was getting her things ‘in order,’ she contacted her Pastor and had him come to her house to discuss certain aspects of her final wishes.
She told him which songs she wanted sung at the service, what scriptures she would like read, and what outfit she wanted to be buried in.
Everything was in order and the Pastor was preparing to leave when the young woman suddenly remembered something very important to her.
‘There’s one more thing,’ she said excitedly.
‘What’s that?’ came the Pastor’s reply.
‘This is very important,’ the young woman continued. ‘I want to be buried with a fork in my right hand.’
The Pastor stood looking at the young woman, not knowing quite what to say.
That surprises you, doesn’t it?’ the young woman asked.
‘Well, to be honest, I’m puzzled by the request,’ said the Pastor.
The young woman explained. ‘My grandmother once told me this story, and from that time on I have always tried to pass along its message to those I love and those who are in need of encouragement. In all my years of attending socials and dinners, I always remember that when the dishes of the main course were being cleared, someone would inevitably lean over and say, ‘Keep your fork.’ It was my favorite part because I knew that something better was coming…like velvety chocolate cake or deep-dish apple pie. Something wonderful, and with substance!’
So, I just want people to see me there in that casket with a fork in my hand and I want them to wonder ‘What’s with the fork?’ Then I want you to tell them: ‘Keep your fork ..the best is yet to come.’
The Pastor’s eyes welled up with tears of joy as he hugged the young woman good-bye. He knew this would be one of the last times he would see her before her death. But he also knew that the young woman had a better grasp of heaven than he did. She had a better grasp of what heaven would be like than many people twice her age, with twice as much experience and knowledge. She KNEW that something better was coming.
At the funeral people were walking by the young woman’s casket and they saw the cloak she was wearing and the fork placed in her right hand. Over and over, the Pastor heard the question, ‘What’s with the fork?’ And over and over he smiled.
During his message, the Pastor told the people of the conversation he had with the young woman shortly before she died. He also told them about the fork and about what it symbolized to her. He told the people how he could not stop thinking about the fork and told them that they probably would not be able to stop thinking about it either.
He was right. So the next time you reach down for your fork let it remind you, ever so gently, that the best is yet to come.
Add comment August 27, 2007
Flipping Exhausted!!!
My boss came in my office this morning and asked me how my weekend was. I said what weekend? What’s this weekend nonsense you speak of. I feel like I’ve never heard of it…because I haven’t had one in a month.
I’m sick and tired of working so much. 15 hour days just aren’t going to cut it for much longer. I’m loving the money, but I don’t think it’s worth it. I mean, I don’t have the time to go out and spend it or enjoy it. So what’s the point? Ya ya, I know I know, I should be saving it and putting it towards my surgery or something. But where’s the fun in that?
I talked to my boss at the restaurant last night and told her I can’t handle so much work anymore. I’m running on fumes and they’re going to run out soon! She said that she understood and that she’d fix my next schedule for me so that I have a whole day off. I can’t wait. To be able to sleep in and not be obligated to do a damn thing all day….sounds nice!
I’m off the next three nights though, so I plan on doing a whole lot of sleeping and not a whole lot of anything else.
Add comment August 27, 2007
Downloading songs…
| I haven’t downloaded songs in nearly two years, so I don’t know which program I should use. Those of you who are tech savvy or who know something about my different options, I could really use some imput. I prefer a free sight, but I’m willing to pay if it’s better or more secure. Any thoughts anyone?
So far it’s a toss up between limewire and iTunes. Imput please! |
Add comment August 24, 2007
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